Episode 1:

The Dream That Changed Everything — Welcome to Raising Me

Show Notes

In the inaugural episode of the Raising Me Podcast, host Bri Ray shares her journey of creating a platform for mixed families and individuals. She reflects on her personal experiences with identity, loss, and the impact of her father's passing. The episode introduces the concept of community and support for those navigating similar challenges, emphasizing the importance of open conversations about race and identity.

Transcript

I actually can't believe I'm sitting here right now. When I tell you guys this is a long time coming, you better believe it. You better believe it. I could spend hours telling you why it took me so long to get here, but why put it off any longer? Hi, my name is Bri Ray and this is the Raising Me Podcast.

Back in 2019, my friend and I started something called Project Black Girl, and the purpose of this project was to create art, create events, create experiences and moments.

around the conversation of growing up as a mixed woman in America. Around 2021, we were both feeling the need to shift what we were doing and for it to take a different shape and go in a different direction. And we decided that we wanted to directly impact the families in the communities that most closely resembles our own and the families that we came from and the dynamics that we grew up in. But we weren't sure.

what we wanted to call it. All we knew is we wanted to offer education, resources, and community to this unique demographic of families and individuals. We knew we wanted to call it something different. Then in 2021, I went on a trip to Hawaii. But rewind for a second, because this is an important part of the story. Before I went to Hawaii, my dad had passed away a few months prior. And if you know anything about me, you know that my dad was like my ultimate bestie.

He knew me better than anybody. He understood me in ways that are hard to explain. And you guys are going to hear a lot about him on this podcast. And I'll try not to cry every time. Or maybe I will, because someone told me one time or I heard one time that tears and crying is just love that was never able to be expressed or given when people leave too soon. So if I cry, you know, we're throwing up some love to Big Papa Ray. But for this episode specifically, the point is, is he was my best friend.

And he passed away and I was feeling lost in some really, really big ways and in ways that I hadn't felt lost before. ⁓ and a lot of those centered around identity. what I was realizing was a lot of those feelings were attached to various aspects of my identity, many of which were race-based. come from a mixed family. So my mom is white, my dad is black. And when my dad passed away, it really felt like my sole connection.

to my blackness died with him. And I felt really confused and honestly really angry about this depth and the heaviness of not knowing who I was all of the sudden. So I go on this trip to Hawaii and one night I have a dream. And in this dream, I'm sitting in a room waiting for someone. And then finally my dad walks in and it just felt like such a gift. Like I was getting this last moment with him to laugh and to cry.

and to talk and towards the end of the conversation, ⁓ we started to talk about some of the questions that I had about these now gaping holes that I felt existed within my identity. And I would be lying if I said I didn't get a little frustrated and I started asking him why, like, why didn't you tell me more? Why didn't you teach me more? Why didn't you show me more? Why didn't you introduce me? Why didn't you take me like when I was growing up? Why didn't you do these things to help nurture

this part of me. Like I have all of these questions now. I have all of these holes in who I think I am or who I'm supposed to be. And I feel so lost and I feel so confused. And he paused and he looked at me with tears in his eyes and he said he thought he'd have more time and he apologized. And then he said that now I had the opportunity to love and to teach and to protect and to build community in the ways that I so desperately needed.

and that he so desperately wished that he had when he was raising me. So now here we are. And from an eagle's eye view, there's a lot that I want to do with raising me foundation. But I guess this podcast is the first step for me and the conversations we're going to have are going to be pretty raw and unpolished because that's the space that the topics we're going to cover exist in. And that's where I'm at. And I am learning with you.

It won't just be me and you every episode. Some of them will be solo episodes. Sometimes I'll have some friends with me to share their lived experiences. Sometimes I will bring in professionals and people that I really admire to share their expertise and to teach us. So if you are an adoptive parent, an interracial couple raising mixed kids, a mixed or adopted young adult who has some questions about who you are and who you want to be and where you fit in the world, because sometimes it feels like we're stuck in between.

This is our space and I'm super honored to share it with you. Consider this your official welcome. I hope you're glad you're here because I know I am and I can't wait to keep growing up together. I'm your host, Bri Ray and this is the Raising Me Podcast.

Keywords

Raising Me Podcast, identity, mixed families, community, loss, Project Black Girl, Bri Ray, personal growth, cultural identity, parenting